Socialites and PB&J

So there are some real advantages to living in India. First, the no brainer - money. The same salary that didn't quit support us in America is enough and more here. That is a nice change. Second - weight loss. We have good food, but it is a different kind. Fewer orders of Super Nachos and more salad. Fewer 64 oz. Mountain Dews and more bottles of water. All my clothes are very baggy and I am going to have to start buying clothes here. Not easy, but still, nice. Third - social standing. Being the boss here means everything. Being the American boss is just that much more prestigious. Fourth - the novelty factor. Being the large American family in the neighborhood means everyone wants to meet us. Now I know that the third and fourth things will eventually fade and we will be just 9 more people out of the billion already here, but in the mean time it is easy to get carried away.

Yesterday, for example. Star On Stage was invited to a new friends house and I was invited to come along for tea. This house was huge and gorgeous, I mean Architectural Digest gorgeous. There was one other mother there who was from Canada. The three of us had a very nice time and talked about all kinds of things. Had we found good help, did we belong to this club or that club, what functions had we attended at the embassy, what did our husbands do, what trips had we planned, blah, blah, blah. The amazing thing was that I was totally comfortable with these conversations and these people.

So as I am sitting there in this palatial house sipping mint lemonade and daintily eating a cucumber finger sandwich all while discussing highly social things, I start to think, "Hey, I'm fitting in. This is my new social circle and it is the popular kids! I'm Cool!" But it is getting late and Star On Stage has school in the morning, so we start to make our exit. As I pick up her swimming towel my arm brushes something strange down by my hip so I glance down and discover to my horror that my pants are unhooked and unzipped! They are wide open and sliding down my hips! If I hadn't noticed at that moment I would have found them around my ankles. I immediately start thinking back trying to decide if there is any way they didn't notice. No, there is no way. In the car on the way home I feel like bawling in humiliation, and then I realize....I am still me. These pants I am wearing? I bought them four years ago, and I replaced the hook at the waist with a saftey pin 18 months ago. It is one of the two pair of pants that I own. I get home to my husband and six other kids and within two minutes I have gravy on my pants and a dirty face smudge on my shirt. "Oh that's right, I am not a socialite!" (I shake off the illusion and thunk my forehead to clear my vision.) Oh well, every girl needs to go to a tea party once in a while. Gotta go, there are peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that need making!